Friday, 19 November 2010

What Possessed Me?

I'm going on an organized day hike this weekend. I don't know what possessed me. It seemed like such a good idea a month ago when the pain of the Inca trail was sufficiently distant, but the high of the hike was sufficiently close. Knowing that this particular hike sells out quickly I booked and paid for it a month ago, but now that the reality is just hours away and I am feeling extremely sleep deprived I am REALLY not loving the idea of getting up at 6am tomorrow to get ready in time to head over to the Upper West Side for an 8.30am pick up!! Ugh!! What was I thinking?

At least the weather is supposed to be nice and the company exceptional, since I am being accompanied by my Inca Trail buddy, Melissa, who is also a glutton for punishment and agreed to this harebrained idea of mine. I'm oddly nervous about the hike which the group site describes as "moderate...covering seven miles of wooded trails," and promises "jaw-dropping views of the Hudson Valley." I should be fine, it can't be that hard, but I can't help but get nervous knots in my stomach. I keep having to give myself the "get a grip, you'll be fine, you've hiked the Inca Trail for God's sake," pep talk.

The hiking is all part of my 'stop working so much, get out and about and see if you can rekindle your romance with New York' campaign. A couple of years ago I was out and about all the time, but recently not so much. Recently I've been working so hard that all I have the energy for at the weekend is the gym, chores and flopping on the couch in front of the TV and it's not exactly feeding my soul, if you'll excuse the self help type speak.

The crux of the matter is that New York and I are experiencing the 10-year itch at the moment and I am not sure that my feelings about the city aren't biased as a result of my feelings towards my job or whether they are as a result of a need to get out for a while, but whatever the reason I just don't get the same tingle about living in the city that I used to. I'm trying not to do anything rash since maybe I am just taking the city for granted, but I miss the tingle. I get a slight frisson when I walk through Grand Central Station, but that's about it, so I went looking for the tingle in San Francisco I didn't really experience much of a tingle there either, but there was a certain excitement about exploring somewhere new and part of me thinks that although my heart belongs to New York, I may need to get away from the city for a year or so to allow myself to fully appreciate it.

We'll see. Anyway I plan to take my camera tomorrow, so with any luck I will get a few nice shots of the beautiful autumn foliage to post on Sunday.


Amel said...

WOW!!! Another hike? GOOD LUCK then and I hope it refreshes you when it comes to your feelings about NY. Looking forward to seeing the pics! :-D

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Thanks Amel, hope you had a fabulous weekend.

Kitty said...

lol. The tingle.

I think the love/hate with NYC is normal, especially, especially when one is stressed out. Mark will go on and on about how resources are limited here and he's tired of competing with all of Brooklyn for a parking space. And then I hear him on the phone telling someone how Brooklyn is incredible, all our food choices and culture, blah blah. ;-)

I really hope you can rekindle the tingle, Fish. Personally I feel it's less about a place than about one's outlook, but that's just me.

What's helped me is photography. It's forced me to see things, even mundane things, in a different light. There are bad days, too, of course.

Hope you find some balance this coming year, Fish. This week should be a good one, being short! :-)

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Hi Kitty, I think I would be less concerned if I did have a love/hate relationship with New York, at least there'd be some passion about living here, but to be honest I'm kind of bored by the city. I on earth can someone be bored by New York, but I think I am. I've spent 10+ years getting out and about and exploring and now I just feel as if I am repeating everything. I think I am looking for a new challenge, but I am cautious not to be too rash. In an ideal world I would be bi-coastal, wouldn't that be nice, to have enough money to flit between both coasts. I can dream :-)