Sunday 9 March 2008

Ash's Hen Party

I’m lounging around at home this morning dithering whether to get dressed and go out for a walk. It looks beautiful out, but looks can be deceiving. Apparently we’re in for 35 to 40 mph gusts of chilly winds, which is giving me pause for thought, especially as at Judy's last night, her neighbour knocked on her door - as we were all sat around with flavoured condoms on our fingers - to let her know that part of the scaffolding had collapsed on the south side of their building and that the fire department had sealed off that part of the street. Eeek!! Fortunately no-one was seriously hurt, but it’s making me carefully consider venturing out. There's a lot of scaffolding in my neighbourhood right now and it’s not like I don't have enough food to hole up at home for the day. I was given a wee care package to take home after Ash’s hen party at Judy’s last night. I have enchiladas, a whole tiramisu cake from the divine downtown patisserie, Financier, and loads of beautiful mini cupcakes and lemon bars - mmmm my favourite - made for us by a pastry chef from Nobu who is a friend of one of the girls at the party. My waistline just winced at the thought of all those cakes. I think I’ll take them into the office tomorrow; my God I will be soooo popular ;-)

The party was excellent anyway, I have to say I was worried the instructor might single people out with questions, or worse, for demonstrations, but she didn’t. Darlinda from
Babeland was lovely, arriving at Judy's with a humungous suitcase of sex toys. She says she had quite a few interesting moments at airport security and had us laughing about the time she was once had to explain a vaginal barbell.

Does my vagina REALLY need home gym equipment???

Some of the toys were eye opening I have to say, I was just looking on their site to see if I could include a link to one thing that looked a bit like a nutcracker - no pun intended - but I can't find it. We were all quite coy with the exception of one woman whose husband had slipped a roll of twenties in her pocket with a note that said “have fun, spend lots of money on toys and don't worry, I won't feel inadequate.” I think he might have reconsidered the inadequate comment had he seen the Rabbit – one of their best sellers ever since the famed
Sex & the City episode. I never knew the tip of that thing rotated like that. Seriously, some of the vibrators she brought with her were so powerful that if you were to dip the tip in the bath...hey presto....you'd have yourself a whirlpool tub ;-)

After the toys, Darlinda passed around the different lubes for us to test on our hands and discussed the benefits of a product called
Pink Lube, one of her favourites. Apparently Pink Lube also doubles as a marvellous hair styling product. Who knew? The only issue is that it can stain, so if it gets on the sheets…it’s not such good news for your linens. I had to laugh when the conversation then took a turn away from sex toys and towards.....laundry and everyone, especially the ones with kids, started exchanging tips on stain removal, it was hilarious.


Anyway, enough of this sexual aids chat, it looks calm enough out there right now, so I think I'm going to venture out for a walk in the sunshine. I need to feel the wind in my hair. Have a lovely day!!

20 comments:

Sid said...

LOL! Oh man thanks for the description of the various toys.

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Always happy to oblige Sid ;-)

Kitty said...

haha!

sounds like a lot of fun. There's honestly nothing like a bunch of women sitting together having a good time!

glad you got out today. Man, it was cold.

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Hi Kitty, yes last night was great fun. I was dreading it a bit, but I'm really glad I went. I had a good long walk through the park and down to the village. I'm knackered after all that fresh air :-)

Blur Ting said...

I've not been to a Hen party. Thanks for giving me an insight into what goes on. Interesting...

Blur Ting said...

Oh, so you went for your walk through the park and down the village...sounds lovely! The wind in your hair, and the sunny skies...

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Hi Blur Ting, I'm glad I was able to give you the hen party scoop. They are all different, some people just go out for drinks and dress the bride to be up, some people see strippers - I am glad we didn't do that - and parties like ours are popular :-)

Yes, I had a lovely walk, although it was about 6miles, so I was really tired when I got home :-)

Bangs and a Bun said...

If ever there were a line to be drawn, I think it should be using lube as a hair product.

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Hey Bangs, yeah, I think I'll be sticking to my standard hair products.

Flowers said...

i often feel that us men miss out on an awful lot of things. then again can you imagine men in the same situation?! think i'd give that one a miss, thank you.

have you seen the news about britain, fish? big storms!

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Hey Flowers, it was an eye opening evening I can tell you.

I did see the news about England, and photos. Crazy crazy weather.

Ashlee said...

Sounds like a fabulous party! I'm sure the hubby would love it if I went to one of those. :0)

Anonymous said...

Those Rabbits are shocking aren't they! I don't think I know anyone over here that doesn't own one*. Have you seen the one with the balls in the middle? They were recalled a while ago because the balls kept escaping!! Escaping! Can you imagine?

NOT including me of course.

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Hi Ashlee, thanks for stopping by. It was a fun party, you should definitely try one ;-)

Hi Pawpads, ESCAPING!!!! Oh my!!

Amel said...

Oh dear...I've never heard of vaginal barbel before!!! So many different toys he he he...

I clicked on the link on the vaginal barbel thingie and it made me wonder that in today's world, everything's commercialized hi hi hi hi hi...

Glad to hear you had fun, though! ;-D

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Hello Amel, nice to see you stranger ;-) Yeah the party was a bit of an eye opener ;-)

Anonymous said...

Sounds like fun Adult Sex Toys

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Hey AST, thanks for stopping by. The party was a lot of fun :-)

Anonymous said...

That is funny about the airport security story. I would feel very awkward!

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Hi Toys, yes I would have been mortified, but Darlinda seemed to take it in her stride. A consumate professional :-)