Sunday, 26 August 2007

Men...step away from the lycra!!!

Walking home through Central Park yesterday afternoon I was most distressed by the sight of a tall, plump, French cyclist man buying a bottle of water from one of the vendors close to East 72nd St. Aforementioned male was wearing stretchy lycra all in one pale grey short shorts number that was so so so very tight that each testicle was visibly lifted and separated!!


My poor poor poor eyes. The image is burned on my retina

I could tell he was French, because he was calling - in French of course - to two women who were walking away from him (I wonder why). I suspect the women were his wife and daughter. How they could have allowed him to leave the house dressed like that I'll never know.

So much for French style!!

I pilfered the above photo from http://krisalis.org/weblog/?p=1483. Attractive isn't it!! My apologies if you were eating!!

16 comments:

alcoment said...

Oh poor you. That must have been a bit if a shock to the system! I can think of times when that kind of get up could be useful, but then I've always had quite a warped mind! But, on a regular basis? There should be very strict guidelines for this sort of attire - maybe with on the spot fines for anyone found to be breaching them

fishwithoutbicycle said...

"I can think of times when that kind of get up could be useful"

....but would you allow him to wear that get up in public????? There were small children in the park I might add!! Shudder!!

Dan said...

You are hilarious!! This post made me LOL.

I haven't eaten yet, so no worries about that. Of course now I'm wondering if I will. How the heck can those guys be comfortable with everything squashed like that??

Thanks so much for visiting my blog and your very sweet words on the post about my dad and brother. That was very sweet of you. Hugs.

alcoment said...

Ah, well, the only time I can think of letting him out in public wearing something like that is if I wanted to scare the small children - which is often a fun and wholesome way to pass the time!

Oh, and if I was running some kind of fetish event I might use him as a walking advertisement - it could work!?

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Hi Dan, thanks for stopping by, glad you enjoyed the post.

Alcoment - Halloween perfect time to wear it ;-)

Anonymous said...

As I have oft said: "Spandex is a privilege, not a right."

Agnes Mildew said...

As racing cyclists and those in Sunday leagues are one of my pet hates, I have enjoyed printing your picture off and using it on my darts board. You can guess what's the bullseye, can't you?!

Their lycra'd packages purely remind me of the greengrocers. A few clingfilm-wrapped mouldy plums and a banana: you know the quality will be poor; they're just dressed up for a quick sale. We won't go into how they might taste...

It is a fallacy that the French are the best-dressed in the world. They just invented the term 'haute couture', that's all - and we all know what garbage that is when it is draped on the catwalks!

I thought the States were getting a fashion police system going? Aren't people banned from letting their trousers hang down showing their backside off in some states now? I'm all for it. I vote to bring back Victorian head to toe garb, send children out to sweep chimneys, stone the adulterers and...

I have been reading too much Dickens, haven't I?

Amel said...

Hi hi hi hi...oh dear!!! ;-D Some people just don't know the limits, eh? ;-D

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Well said PA, spandex should indeed be a privilege. In fact unless you're female or a member of Aerosmith there should be no wearing of spandex. Ever!!! Do you think he looked in the mirror before he left the house?

Thanks Agnes, I can always rely on you to make me laugh out loud. I didn't know that they had banned the low slung trouser in some states. That's certainly not the case in New York. I heard they style is actually an advantage to the police since if the wearer has been caught engaged in criminal activity his low slung pants are problematic when he tries to run away ha ha!!

Amel said...

Hi, Fish,

Since I LOVE your blog, I'd love to share this with you...

I Love Your Blog

Btw, THANKS for making me laugh...I agree with Dan. You ARE hilarious! ;-D

Victorya said...

There must have been some sort of race, they were up by my park too, all those men in lycra biking and joking like it's okay to be all hanging around like that

*shudder*

Mr and Mrs Knutzen said...

My boss rides to work every morning and walks in the office in one of these get ups...leaves nothing to the imagination.

Heather said...

i just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

posts like that should come with a warning before i burn out my retinas.

i'm just saying...

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Sorry Heather ;-)

Anonymous said...

I've seen this pic before. Hard to believe its real.

Anonymous said...

I don't care if they're practical, bicycle shorts are repulsive.

Men need to be told... no... your hoochie IS NOT visually appealing. To anyone. Ever.