Saturday, 13 August 2011

What's that weirdo smiling at?

So I ended up missing yesterday morning's surfing lesson due to illness. I'm not sure what was going on, but I woke up to my alarm at 6am feeling queasy, had some tea and dry toast in the hope of calming things down and about 15minutes later I ran, nay sprinted, to the bathroom and - sorry TMI I know - threw it all back up. Ugh!! My balance was also seriously off kilter too so popping up on a surf board was out of the question - I tried a few test pop ups on my bed* and uh-oh, so not good. On the positive side I did feel very very thin as I laid on my futon watching Live Free Die Hard - gotta love free movies on demand - so perhaps it's not entirely impossible that I might lose 5lbs and slip into that bikini in San Diego in a few weeks. Silver linings!!

The surf school were kind enough to let me reschedule my lesson for next weekend without forfeiting any deposit, which was very nice of them and I am hoping my friend Deesha will be able to make that lesson too. She's expressed a keen interest in giving it a try and said she's free next weekend and the following one, but unlike me she's not one of life's morning people, so I think having to get up early on a weekend to take the subway out to Far Rockaway will be a deal breaker, but I'm hopeful I can lure her there with the promise of Caracas Arepas and Blue Bottle coffee - the best!! - as a post surfing treat.

I'm not entirely sure what was going on stomach wise, I don't suspect anything that I ate, I think I was probably just run down, nevertheless I am taking things easy and swearing off the drink and foods that could potentially unsettle my stomach, like the bag of wasabi peas I just threw out because they were batting their eyelashes at me and giving me that come hither look, wasabi+iffy tummy=not a good combo and I knew I would give in to temptation if I did not take drastic action.

By 3pm yesterday I was about 90% back to normal - managed to keep down a potato - so I kept my dinner plans at Madera in Long Island City with Melissa and Orla and decided that I may as well keep the brunch date I had scheduled for today at 1pm with Brooklyn Mike at Max Brenners** - I'd been tempted to cancel given the state I was in - however Brooklyn Mike had other ideas as when I got home from dinner with the girls I had an email from him saying "I'm sorry, but I have to cancel our date tomorrow as I have started seeing someone, Mike."

Now I know this is entirely the wrong attitude, but I couldn't help but think "Yayyyyyyyyy!!" when I saw his note. Nothing against Brooklyn Mike who seemed like a nice guy based on the emails we exchanged, but I'm feeling a bit worn down by the whole online dating thing at the moment, although I'm trying to stick with it since you've got to be in it to win it right and you never know when the right person will come along, but between ketchup boy last week; Pedicab Owning bloke who left me perverted emails and texts - I blocked him sharpish; older surfer bloke who turned up 30-minutes late and barely shrugged an apology; Joe who turned up to our date wearing a t-shirt that looked like it had been lining the dog basket only hours before; the background actor who talked incessantly about himself as if the whole date was a dry run for an upcoming interview on Inside The Actors Studio and....well you get the picture and it's exhausting!! I was flipping through Time Out New York when I got home last night for weekend inspiration and had to laugh when I came across a listing for a free discussion
at the New York Public Library next Wednesday: "The Evil Men Do: Inside the Mind of the Sexual Predator," where a panel of crime writers speak with a psychologist about what it means to dive into the mind of the deranged. I think attending that would be all I'd need to push me over the edge of never dating again. Ha ha!!

Speaking of men I bumped into my ex, Tel Aviv, last week as I walked home through the park after a Total Body Conditioning class. I'd walked into the park from West 68th street, right by where Tavern On The Green used to be and I noticed this guy about 20 feet in front of me staring intently and smiling in my direction.

"What's that weirdo smiling at?" I thought and then immediately dismissed the fact that he was looking at me and decided he must be smiling at someone behind me, but as I drew closer it became apparent that he was staring at me and as we drew level he turned said to me "really, really, it's been so long that you don't recognize me?" which is when I clicked it was Tel Aviv ha ha!! Clearly a boost to his ego, not. Well to be fair it has been almost 4-years since we dated.

We caught up as we walked across the park to East 72nd street. He's doing well, he seemed much the same except he's now married with a 7-month old daughter and living on the Upper West Side. I think that's why I didn't connect the weirdo smiling at me with it being him since I never expected to run into him uptown. He lived in the Financial District when we dated, so seeing him above 14th street was out of context for me. I had to laugh when he gave me shit for working too hard and not having enough fun in my life. This from a man whose idea of a fun weekend was to go to the Borders across the street and sit in the cafe reading IT books!! Please!! As we closed in on 72nd and 5th he turned to me and said that he really wanted to apologize for the way he ended things.

Sigh, eyeroll.

"It's fine, it was 4-years ago, it's water under the bridge," I responded
"But I want to apologize," he said
"Seriously, there's no need."
"Well, okay, I admit, I need to apologize to make myself feel better."

Yeah, whatever, go ahead apologize to absolve your own conscience then. Seriously why do men feel the need to do that so long after the fact? It's not in the least bit meaningful to me 4 years down the road, it's better to just shut up and leave it be to my mind because quite frankly I'm only going to think less of you for indulging your own need to clear your conscience and not being man enough to say something at the time of the break up, but hey, you go ahead.

*Fellow pop-up practitioners I came across this handy tip for practicing pop ups on your bed via the ehow surf tips video and here - the embed code seems to be a bit iffy - below as a good way of simulating the instability of the ocean and I've found it to be an effective way to practice.

**His suggestion not mine. I did balk at his choice of restaurant since it comes across a bit theme-y for my tastes and I'm not a massive lover of sweet dishes which I am assuming are their specialty since the restaurant's tag line is 'Chocolate by the bald man', but admittedly I am a bit of a restaurant snob and he did win brownie points for actually suggesting a place since I find that most men ask me out and then ask me to do the work of coming up with a place to meet at.


Anonymous said...

Not IT books, it's software! big difference.

fishwithoutbicycle said...

Oh don't give me that Tel Aviv, you were sooooo reading IT books ;-)

Anonymous said...

:-) ok, I deduct 3 points for abstraction, try to keep it concret next time. See you around pontificating fish :-)